unprecedented awakening.

ripples that steadily form into tidal waves.
washing over and flooding life into everything desperate. dry. withering.
  
a single spark exploding into a mass of radiance. 
pressing through a barely cracked open door.
swinging wide the barrier with an invasion of light.


darkness vanished.


illuminated love and hope in homes.
on the streets. entire cities. the world.
nations.


souls no longer sleepwalking.


eyes opened.
seeing again.
truly seeing. 
the way we were created to see.

ears unplugged.
hearing again.
truly hearing. 
the way we were created to hear.

minds renewed.
knowing again.
truly knowing.
the way we were created to know.

bodies healed.
living again.
truly living.
the way we were created to live.

emotions captivated.
feeling again.
truly feeling. 
the way we were created to feel.

hearts beating.
loving again.
truly loving.
the way we were created to love.

an army rising up.
walking in the confidence and power of our true identity. 

the way we were created to walk.

on earth as it is in heaven.

keep hoping, waseca.

There will always be something special about your hometown. 

Mine rests in southern Minnesota where highway 13 and highway 14 intersect. As you drive into the city, the signs welcome you and invite you to "Discover Waseca".

If you spend much time there and get to know the residents in this little town, I think you'd quickly discover that there is a unique sense of community. I totally felt it growing up but didn't realize the depth until I graduated college and I'd come back to visit. 

Just see what happens when students gather for a sporting event and the community rallies around them. Or when the Marching Jays play their show one last time long after the judges are gone and it's just the parents and others from the community who traveled hours to cheer them on with an outpouring of support. 

Or see what happens with tragic events hit hard. There is a coming together to encourage each other towards healing. 

But there have been too many of these instances over the years and even recent months. Another one just occurred in the last 24 hours. There is a sadness inside knowing that when life ends abruptly, it has deep impact on many people whom I love so dearly. I mourn alongside you, family and friends.

In the midst of this mourning, I am compelled to speak of Hope.  

City and community of Waseca, you are a unique and special people with a purpose and destiny. Declare with me for the release of Life and Hope that comes from the heart of Jesus to fill the streets of this city and saturate the lives of all who reside there! We speak Life over Waseca! 

This song, by Kristine Mueller, was written as a song of Hope for San Francisco. It's a genuine and mighty cry out for a city to keep holding on to the promise that God will bring freedom, healing, and restoration to a wounded community.

"So keep hoping, [Waseca]...You'll see the sun shine again over your city streets..."

cartwheels.

Cartwheels = Joy.

I'll explain.

Some of you, if you're like me, can't really do a cartwheel. I can hardly do a summersault without getting dizzy. 

I'm not kidding.

Whatever happened to the days I could flip upside down, spin around in circles, and roll down hills without losing my cookies?

Things change, I guess.  

I didn't associate cartwheels with joy until last week. It was part of the crazy adventure last Friday. You can read more about that here if you haven't already. Looking for a reason to believe that God speaks and truly wants to love us? Then check it out. It's a long story, but totally worth the read. 

After passing a very bad accident on the way to the cities, we were overcome with sadness and grief. It's hard to describe what shifted in the air. But something definitely shifted.

A few miles more down the road, we passed a baseball field full of children. They were playing and throwing around a huge ball to one another. A girl wearing red out in left field caught my eye. Out of nowhere, she did a cartwheel. It brought a smile to my face in the midst of a heaviness that we were feeling after the accident scene. Something shifted again in the air, this time in the direction of Hope.

I really don't think this girl was disinterested in the throw-a-super-giant-ball-at-each-other-game. Who wouldn't enjoy that?!

Although I don't really know everything she was thinking in the moment she gracefully rolled herself over, I do like to think she just had something inside her that compelled her to release some goodness and joy out there on that green playing field on a sun filled, fall afternoon.

I like to think she just couldn't help it.

When you've got the joy and you are full of it to the point of overflowing, it's hard not to do a cartwheel. Or laugh uncontrollably. Or speak words of Life and Hope. Or serve humbly. Or forgive. Or honor one another. 

You might be asking, "But, what about the times when trial and pain are all around me? What about the times I pass by a horrendous accident on the road of life? It's hard to do a cartwheel then."

Then hold onto Joy and lean into God's Truth in the midst of challenge with such intensity that you leave an imprint in Him. He's the source of joy. When you press into Him, it'll absorb right into you.

Then release it to the world around you...

Do a cartwheel.

amber: precious jewel.

"You will release Life today."

  

These words, a promise from God, written in black ink rested between the blue lines on a simple piece of college lined notebook paper. They were scribed onto that paper during a drive down to the cities Friday afternoon.

  

The trip started like any other roadtrip. Classmates of the Bemidji Area School of Transformation, but more so friends on an incredible journey of learning together, piled into two vehicles. We were anticipating the day ahead while dancing to the music in the car, chatting away and getting to know each other.

  

We were on our way to listen to Randall Worley at a church in Burnsville. We left early so we could go to the Mall of America beforehand to see how God was at work there.

  

And of course He was at work there. He's at work everywhere.
  
On our last stretch of the trip, we all took time together to focus on God, His heart, and His desires for the day and sought after what the Father was doing so that we could partner with that.
  
As this occurred, a police car sped past us. Right after, I closed my eyes and put in earphones. We didn't know yet, but up ahead was a scene that would cause a seriousness and grief to settle over us all.
  
Because my eyes were shut and I had headphones in my ears up until we drove directly by, I didn't have much time to take in everything that was going on. But there was enough time for some vivid images to flood my mind. There was a car totally mangled and flipped over while a small group of people were huddled around a body laying on the ground in the ditch. They were covering the person up with a blanket.
  
We immediately started praying and interceding. We prayed about whether or not we should stop. We heard "no." So we kept driving. Two of us (without knowing until a little later) saw angels of comfort completely immersed in the situation.
  
Passing the scene of that accident shifted something in the air around us. Soon after, Becky called us from the other car to process what just happened.
  
Steph heard something very specific as she prayed and as it was shared, much stirred in our spirit. She heard God say that he wanted to intervene in a life or death situation while we were at the Mall of America. It was a wake up call for us that we needed to be alert to what God was doing that day. 
  
I'm not sure any of us really knew what this life and death situation was going to look like, but something inside knew that God was speaking clearly and intently to us. There was a confidence that when we saw it, we'd know.
  
I need to explain something more before I move on. When we pulled out of the driveway in Bemidji, I noticed Steph's license plate was SRB116. 
  
You know how when you see your name or your initials, it snags your attention? I guess when we see our name or identity, it does something inside. As it should.
  
Well, SRB are my initials. When I saw that I immediately thought Psalm 116 because it reminded me of my amazing Uncle Donnie and Aunt Susie. In 1998, my cousin, Nick (their son), was killed in a motorcycle accident. After he died, my aunt shared a story about how the license plate of his truck encouraged her. (I don't recall the specifics of how right now.) I also recalled how after Nick died she woke up in the middle of the night and was lead to read Psalm 116.
  
Even though that psalm came to mind right away when seeing SRB116, I didn't read it until after we passed the accident.
  
You can read the psalm here.

I was blown away by the theme of death and life in this passage. It was completely fitting with what we were praying about and overall sensed as we continued towards the cities.
  
I was going to share it with my friends in the car, but decided to wait until the song that we were listening to at the time, You Won't Relent, was over. Meanwhile, I decided to copy down the passage on another piece of paper.
  
As I'm writing the first line, "I love the Lord, for..." Justin asks from up front, "Hey Suzanne, you have your Bible?"
  
"Yyyyyep."
  
"Can you turn to Psalm 116?"
  
*insert slight jaw drop moment*
  
"Uhhhh, yeah, so I'm opened up to that right now and I just starting copying it down."
  
Wow.
  
We read it outloud and God used it big time as we got closer to the mall. It affirmed that we were to keep our peace and joy as we partnered with the Holy Spirit that day.
  
Alright, jump ahead to us at the mall. We broke up into a few groups and started walking around. Some of us had some specific leadings as to where to go. 
  
(And FYI - there are more great testimonies of that day that we are praising and thanking God for! He truly worked through everyone that day. I love partnering with you guys! God is awesome.) 
  
Once we got to the mall each of us moved forward with the ways God had spoken to us on the way down. For me, there was one particular place in the mall I kept envisioning. I was incredibly compelled to linger around a specific restaurant. 
  
I eventually reached that area with Heather and Mark. Right when we arrived there, Heather leaned over to me and declared, "There is major peace here."
  
So true.
  
The impression we had was to just hang out there and God would reveal the next steps.
  
A few minutes later, I found myself standing next to one of the girls that worked there. She was tidying things up. It's hard to explain, but words were coming out of my mouth before I even had time to think about what I was saying.
  
"This seems like a really fun place to work. Do you enjoy it here?" I asked.
  
This simple question opened the door to a phenomenal, divine conversation.
  
A few minutes into our conversation, she asked me what I was doing at the mall. I shared that I was a part of a ministry school in Bemidji and we were going to a speaker at a church in Burnsville that night.
  
I felt silenced about saying anything about being at the mall to see how God was at work. It's like God put a little cork in my mouth in that moment. So I stood there, not sure what to say.
  
In my silence, the next thing she said was, "I haven't been to church in like three years..."
  
She then opened up a bit about her life and background. What emerged next was a genuine desire and hunger for something of God. She said that she would like to go to church again, but didn't know where to go.
  
Okay, God...what do you want me to do with this? She's desiring this, but I live no where near the cities and I highly doubt she'll roadtrip to Bemdiji each Sunday morning. ;)
  
What did I hear? 
  
"Connect her."
  
I asked her, if she was comfortable, if she'd like to give me her name and contact info and I'd connect her with some of my friends in the cities who go to church. I know they'd welcome her and love to go with her and help her check things out.
  
She agreed and we exchanged names and numbers.
  
As I handed her a little slip of paper with my info, she started to cry.
  
Quietly and almost to herself, she said, "I can't believe I'm having this conversation right now."
  
What she shared next still causes me to come before God with great awe...possibly even more so then the first time around. It blows me away every time I think about it.
  
With tears in her eyes, she shared, "Two days ago, I tried to kill myself. And today...I almost didn't come to work. I was going to call in..."
  
But there she stood.
  
And there I stood.
  
And there God was in our midst, radically pursuing His precious daughter.

She said she was looking for a sign that someone truly cared about her. 
  
That's exactly what God did that day. He won't relent, "for there is love that is as strong as death, jealously demanding as the grave...
  
...and many waters cannot quench this love."
  
She was in awe. I was in awe. We were both trying to absorb everything as we both had tears in our eyes.
  
Things from earlier in the day were starting to make much more sense as she also told me that she had been looking for a sign that she was truly loved by someone.
  
God was bringing life, intervening in a life and death situation.
  
Wow, wow, wow.  
  
Declare my love to her and read Psalm 116...
  
And share about why you're at the mall.
  
God removed that cork from my mouth as that became the right time to share. I released God's Words of Life. I told her the story about the trip down. The accident. How we were lead to Psalm 116. That we were at the mall because God was at work there and wanted to have encounters with people. And that, among many other ways God was at work that day, he wanted to bring Life into a life or death situation.
  
After I declared the psalm over her we talked some more.
  
Eventually, I laid hands on her and prayed.
  
Friends, there is power in the name of Jesus. Call upon His name! He is mighty to save.
  
After making sure she was going to be okay when she got off work our conversation came to a close she said, "Maybe you can call or text me later with another thing to read in the Bible?"
  
"Absolutely, Amber. Do you have a Bible at home?"
  
"I don't," she replied.
  
Well, she does now. 
  
It has duct tape wrapped around it to hold it together. There are tear stains on some of the pages that fell from my face during secret place time with my Daddy. And there's a yellow star sticky note with my name on it in the front cover. I kept it in there and told her, "When you think of it, you can pray for me, too, k?"
  
I had slipped in my Bible those college lined pieces of paper from the car ride down with prayers and promptings for the day. As I pulled them out, Ephesians caught my eye. Just the day before, as part of an assignment for school, I had hi-lighted everything in blue in chapters 1 and 2 that declared our identity in Christ. This pointed her to the next part of Scripture to read.
  
We hugged goodbye, told her I loved her and that God loved her like crazy and we parted ways.
  
I walked out into the busy mall, speechless. Yet my spirit was sending out major and intense thanksgiving to God.
  
Later that night I received a text from Amber.
  
"Thank u god blessed me with u today it kinda changed my life. I can't believe how he works and puts people together. thank u for the bible I read the highlighted parts and I couldn't help but cry. I hope u really can find someone I can meet to go to church. I feel so new...I went from wanting to die and give up on my life and kids and something brought u into the store. :)"
  
That "something" is the Holy Spirit. And friends, this "something" is seeking to lead you into the very places that God wants to breathe Life and shine Light. Church, come awake and let's move forward into our calling and identity! Testimonies like this are becoming our new normal.
  
Let's walk in this new normal! We have been given and already possess all that we need to see heaven invade earth!
  
...
  
Since Friday, Amber and I have been in communication and have helped to link her up with some awesome friends in the cities. The Holy Spirit will carry things forth into more and more Life.
  
Something else hit me the other day. I felt like there was something to this during our conversation. The whole time we talked, we were standing by these coffeemugs with names on them. The entire time we talked, she was "tidying" up this area so that we could keep talking and she could appear to keep "working." :) It was cute.
  
I believe there is something about identity here. After I got home, I looked up what Amber means and what the color, amber, means.
  
Amber: precious jewel.
The color amber: the Father's heavenly care, glory of God
  
Amber, your life is purposeful! Your life will shine the glory of God to many. You have greatly impacted my life already. I thank God for you and your life! You are a beautiful, loved, and cherished Daughter of the Father. You are His precious jewel.
  
Thanks be to our Glorious Father!
  
*Amber gave me permission to share this story.*

like a waterfall.

It is, indeed, a new season.

I mean that in a lot of ways.

I am not going to go into every realm in which that is true but I feel the need to declare that it is a new dawn! 

A new day!

A new season!

Like, now. 

It's not a future event. (Yes, that sounds strangely familiar to something Jillian Michaels says in one of her crazy ridiculous work out videos.)

Last March, I heard God say a new day and a new dawn was coming.

Yesterday, I heard Jillian Michaels say that "transformation is not a future event. It's a present activity." Little does she know how much God spoke through her as she kicked my butt during a workout.

This new day is not a future event. It's a present reality.  

The sky has officially and wonderfully turned from vast darkness to the warm colors of a morning dawn.

And the sun has started to peak it's glorious light over the horizon.

It's bright. 

It's beautiful. 

This picture (especially from a little phone camera) doesn't do justice to the beauty of what God is up to. Take this image and magnify the glory and beauty times...oh, i don't know...at least 33 trillion and that might almost line up to the awesomeness and wonder of this new day that God has brought forth.

...Wow. 

What new day or new season is God bringing forth in and around you? Ask Him. He'll show and tell. 

Remember, He speaks. And we can hear Him.

There are so many dimensions to the new day that God has created into existence. I am learning to live in this new day and season. Just like last May, there is more new territory and I've recently turned onto more unfamiliar roads. 

I'm very much a growing and stretched student of God right now. 

It's gooooooooood to be stretched. I'm wearing a rubber band around my wrist for the rest of this school year to remind myself of that. 

One current stretching and tension I'm living in is how to steward my time.

It looks a lot different than it did this summer. Because of my work schedule and how my life looked at that time, I had lots and lots of time to soak in God's presence and also enjoy the company of lots and lots of different people and partner with God in these relationships and circles of connections.

Well, I know that I still NEED super solid time of soaking with God in this new season and any and every season yet to come. So that cannot be shortchanged...ever.

It keeps me grounded and is the source of my strength, joy, hope, vision, identity and deep desire to release Life and Light into darkness. Intimate time with Father God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit deeply compels me to outward mission.

There are so many "good" things right now that I could spend my time doing. But I'm sensing that as part of this new season, I need to have laser-pointed focus on where and with whom I am to be intentional.

Between working full time and being a student with the Bemidji Area School of Transformation (connected to Bethel School of Supernatural Ministry), I don't have the kind of free time that I did this summer.

I'm learning more about boundaries (again!) and learning to say "no".

Strrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrretch.

Sometimes it's saying "no" to seemingly good things. Like hanging out with people. Leading a small group. Being a part of a small group. Helping start 24/7 prayer at church. Going downtown 2-3 nights a week. These are a few of the good opportunities before me in the last week alone. I want to do them all to some degree. But I can't. And shouldn't.

It's becoming about asking, "God, what are you doing" and then saying "yes" to the right things...the things that line up with what He's doing and where He wants me to go and what He wants me to do. Otherwise I will totally burn out if I just say yes to every single great opportunity that crosses my path. Which I have to admit, I can be tempted to do. But I guess that's never really a healthy way to live no matter what season you're in even if you have all the time in the world.

God, what are you doing?

I totally sense God greatly narrowing my focus when it comes to relationships and places of mission for a season.

Don't hear me wrong, I'm not saying that I'm not investing in relationships or living missionally. But in this new season, it looks very different than it has looked. I'm still discovering what that means.

I do know that I'm going to have a small inner circle of close and trusted friends that I'm journeying along in life, as iron sharpens iron, whom I will connect with intentionally and consistently. I praise God for these amazing, trusted friends.

I also know that Light is not meant to be hidden, so I will still shine and invade darkness in partnership with Him. And have some fun knocking down some walls that are holding the Light back right now. Ha!

But how I'm to serve and what that all looks like...totally asking God what's going on here. I have soooo many things on my mind and heart. I trust He'll hi-lite the people and places.

I believe direction will come more and more in that secret time with Him. Another reason I need that time. And we all need that time. It aligns us more with His heartbeat and moves us to move with Him.

This song has stalked me the last few months. It came up again tonight during school. 

Oh Lord, I need You.

Capture me and steal me away.

Take me deeper, into Your heart.

Surround me with Your love and hold me close.

And never, never let me go.

So close that I can feel Your every breath until my heart begins to dance with Yours..

Never let me go.

Won't you take me to a new place.

To a realm of mercy and grace.

Where love, love flows heavy.

Like a waterfall.
Like a waterfall of honey.

Let Your love be poured out on me.

Overcome me.

-United Pursuit Band-Waterfall

it's not random.

God speaks.

It's really quite simple. 

But we complicate it. We think we can't hear Him. We tune into the wrong voices. We doubt.

Yet the Truth remains. 

He speaks.

We can hear Him.

God wants to interact with us. Focus in on that Truth.

If you are reading this, know right now that the God who created this world also created you and wants to breathe Life into your soul by speaking words of Life into your very being.

It's set on my heart tonight to share words of Life that the Living God spoke through Justin Rizzo during an IHOP Worship With the Word session on August 6th.

I could go deep with how these words have been interacting with my soul in the last number of weeks, but I don't believe that's the point right now. Plus, one thing He's teaching me lately is that not everything that happens in our relationship with Him needs to be shared. There is secret time with Him that's not intended for others to see. Cool, huh? I like that.

Friends, enjoy Him. May your ears and soul be open to the Holy Spirit and receive whatever it is that He is speaking into your life.

August 6, 2011, 8am Worship:

You say, "But Lord, all that I've longed for has yet to appear and I just seem to be shifting and changing year after year. 

Going here. Going there. Trying to find. Going there. Moving here.

Wandering."

But the Lord says, "You are in my purpose."

The Lord says, "You are in my will." 

The Lord says, "Even as you go, I will direct your steps. I am leading you. I have always been. I'm not far away or detached from you.

You've been blaming yourself for who you are. But I'm saying I love every part of you. You are beloved. I love who you are. And I brought you here this very morning. I brought you here to hear me loud and clear.

Do not despise that which I have made. Do not doubt me.

My leadership of your life is perfect," says the Lord.

"And as you go, I'm there with you. It's my hand leading you.

Oh, how I love you.
Oh, how I love you.
Oh, how I love you," says the Lord of hosts.

"Oh, how I love you. Oh, how I love you.

You're beautiful.

You're beautiful.

Just rest in me. Just rest in me.

Just rest in me.

I love you so dearly.

Just rest in me. Just rest in me.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful. Just rest in me.

Let me do my work in you," says the Lord.

"Let it go deep.

Let it go deep.

Let it go deep.

Your identity is in me.

You're beautiful because I created you.

It's not about what you do.

You're beautiful simply because I dreamed a dream and I brought you forth.

Do you know the plans I have for you?" says the Lord.

"I brought you forth. I have you all figured out. You're not a mystery to me. I have your life planned. And it's more than you've ever dreamed. You're not a mystery to me. I have your life planned. And it's more than you've ever dreamed. You're beautiful.

So rest. 

So rest. 

So rest in me.

The journey is only just begun. So rest in me, my fair one.

You're not made a mistake. Every single road you've been on you've been learning. I've been teaching.

It's not random what I'm doing in you.

You're not a mystery to me. I have you all figured out. For I formed and created you. Know this without a doubt. 

You're beautiful. 

So rest in me."

unplugged.

I baptized my phone in Lake Bemidji today. It certainly was not intentional but in many ways, I think it was a good thing.

Also, internet is down at home. Again, I think this can be a good thing.

I decided to hit up the library to make a post on Facebook just in case anyone has been texting or calling me today just to let them know I'm not ignoring them. 

It kind of makes me laugh how dependant we are on technology to stay connected. It seems like the things that keep us "in touch" with others are all devices that need to be plugged in to stay charged up to make our connections possible.

Right now, although I am on a computer at the library for another 30 minutes, it kind of feels good to be unplugged. I'll expand on this in a bit.

But first, like I said, I didn't intentionally throw my phone into the lake today. It was just one of those moments. I smelled cigarette smoke and I was trying to turn around to see if someone was hovering above me or around me smoking. Not sure what I was going to do if that was the case. Probably just move. I dislike cigarette smoke and it was distracting me.

Anyway, as I tried to turn, that's when things went downhill. My eyes got huge as I tried to catch my little Droid as it slid off the rock and hung in air centimeters above the surface of the water. My headphone chord was, at that point, saving it from the water. But my phone was just a few ounces too heavy for the chord to bear the weight. It plopped in. I fished it out immediately and...well, I didn't swear...but my words weren't exactly praiseworthy words. I almost got mad about it but then I actually laughed a little bit.

Just earlier in the day I was reminded that I actually wanted to downgrade my phone because I don't really need all the fancy features of a smart phone and I could save some money. Although, my idea of downgrade didn't involve Lake Bemidji anywhere in the process, but oh well.

Also, I was listening to a song by United Pursuit Band as it took the plunge. The last words I heard in my ear were, "You are good, You always will be..."

God started to turn my attitude around.

And then I suddenly felt free being disconnected.

"Come away with Me," He whispered in my ear.

That's why I had gone down to the lake in the first place. It was a place to meet with God and just be still before Him. So much has been happening in the recent weeks. So much to thank Him for! So much to rejoice over! So much to try and take in. New life is springing up in this city. A new normal is forming. A changing season is underway.

I've said this before, but I love summer. When September came, it brought Autumn weather right along with it. It's not bad by any means. I just love summer! And so it makes me kind of sad seeing it's departure. 


The song, Every Season, that inspired this blog has a great line about the changing of summer to autumn. "I will offer thanks for what has been and what's to come. You are autumn." This is perfect for the changing of seasons right now.

The seasons change (weather-wise) is reflective of another changing season of life and journey with Christ. I moved to a new house for work. I changed from overnights to day shift. I'm starting Bemidji Area School of Transformation next week. New schedules. New relationships forming. Lots of learning. And growing. 

And God is moving mightily...

There are seriously stories daily of seeing Him transform lives here. And everytime something awesome happens, I keep hearing, "This is just the beginning..." WOW.

A new normal is developing. A new season of transformation and revival. It's incredibly amazing and also challenging at the same time. God is shifting things in my heart and surroundings. Being grounded and rooted is an emerging theme once again. Finding steadiness in Him is of utmost importance. Not running on fumes of the amazing stories, but running on the fuel He provides directly from secret time with Him is what is needed.

So now I'm unplugged from things that sometimes distract me and this afternoon has been good. Song of Songs swept me away.

Arise my darling, my beautiful one. Come with me...